Fear

For some reason, I have been paralyzed by fear. In the past weeks, as my search for a job in China intensified, so did my fear for being cheated. It's strange. I guess that was one of the big reasons why I ended up staying in Japan for two year although I had originally wanted to go to China.

In the past few days, I imagined myself feeling extremely foreign in China. I imagined being very helpless in the classroom and no one there to come to my aid.

This is weird considering I had even less prep when I was going to Japan and I wasn't afraid about going to Japan at all.

The idea of going to China excites me, but having to figure everything out on my own is a bit daunting. I'm a chicken, I know...but I'm wondering if I'll actually end up there this year. Ahhhh....

Trying to not get swindled

I've been looking at job postings to teach in China very seriously for the past couple of weeks. There are a billion schools hiring for very little pay. I have accepted that wages are not going to be as high as I am used to. That's not exactly what I had hoped for, but it's fine.

However, I can't seem to get my head around how I am supposed to figure out which organizations are legit and which ones are simply big scams. There are countless horror stories about how bosses, aka "principals" don't pay their workers and even worse ones of bosses who steal passports!

How do you really know?

Fly like a bird

Yesterday and today was the Aoba Matsuri.
It's a festival where Japanese people of all ages across the city come out and dance on the streets like sparrows.
Yes, the bird.

When I heard about this festival last year, I was really excited...until I saw it. It was group after group of 20-50 people doing the same moves (in a different order) to the same music!!! I'm not sure how this can come out in a non-offensive fashion, but it was BORING.

This year, I figured that if I actually was a part of the festivities, it would make it more exciting to me.
Nope. Wrong.

Because I couldn't commit to the endless hours of practice for the dance steps (and they are complicated, I admit), I wasn't able to join the dancing. For those who know me also know that I lack rhythm, so drumming was also out of the question.

I was fine with not participating at all...until my friend called me. Her group wanted me to be the flag bearer! Haha...so, for two days, I beared the flag for a group called "Wings," got face makeup like a sparrow and wore a Japanese style festival shirt with "Wings" printed on the back. I paraded down the road and went on stage and waved the flag like I knew what I was doing. Ah, another thing I can write on my resume now. "Sparrow-representative."